


Essential

by Dawnrider



Series: King of Anything Series [3]
Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Living Together, Making Up, Rejection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-20
Updated: 2020-05-20
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:13:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,374
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24293401
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dawnrider/pseuds/Dawnrider
Summary: Quarantine Fic: Nurse Practitioner Kagome is doing her best to keep her patients, herself and her hanyou boyfriend safe. It's exhausting being Essential. Inuyasha, feeling like he's not doing enough, offers to help protect Kagome.From a Tumblr prompt: "Don't lie to me."
Relationships: Higurashi Kagome/InuYasha
Series: King of Anything Series [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1599280
Comments: 8
Kudos: 69





	Essential

**Author's Note:**

> This is an intermediate drabble in the King of Anything series. Based on a Tumblr prompt for fluff/angst. WHELPS, you get both!
> 
> Follow my Tumblr @dangerouspompadour for updates, teasers and randomness. I also frequently share the amazing works of my co-creators in this diverse fandom, so follow to find other amazing pieces you might like even more!
> 
> Thanks to Lemonlush for reading it over and challenging me to up my angst game a bit!

Kagome collapsed into bed, hair still wet from her shower and smelling strongly of the antibacterial soap she was using consistently these days. She knew it wouldn’t specifically help against the virus, but it made her feel a little better. Inuyasha had gotten used to it, but that didn’t mean he liked that it so thoroughly erased her natural scent. At the same time, he understood that it was for his safety and her peace of mind that she used the strong body wash.

Slowly curling up beside her, knowing she often needed a moment before she felt up to allowing close contact, he watched her take measured breaths. She was doing a short meditation. It helped her to calm her frazzled nerves a little, but he knew that her stress level was still not coming down. "Are you ok?" he finally whispered when she opened her eyes again.

She paused. A breath. "Yes…”

Inuyasha scowled, knowing she couldn’t see him in the dark the way he could see her. He gently touched her wrist. “Don’t lie to me.”

There was another pause. “No," she gasped shakily. He let out a soft breath and, slowly - allowing her to push him off if she needed to - pulled her into his arms. 

"Look, I don't like you going in there… you could…"

Kagome stiffened in his hold. "We talked about this. I have to go."

Unconsciously, Inuyasha tucked her closer. "But, Kagome, you could get sick! Not just from the actual virus, but from all this stress." He took a breath and brought up what he’d been thinking about for some time. "I can get another job to cover…"

Kagome let out a soft growl. "It's my job, Inuyasha, and it's important to me." She looked into his eyes and tried to make sure he knew she wasn’t mad at him, just generally  **_tired_ ** . "You have your classes you teach online. That's helpful. Keeping the dojo afloat is important too."

“I know but…”

“Just kiss me, please?” Despite wanting to continue the argument, he did as she asked, pressing his lips to hers carefully. She gripped the back of his shirt with clenched hands, desperate to keep him close. Inuyasha took his time, slowing her down, calming her heart rate with gentle touches. Kagome fought him a bit for control, but finally gave over to him making love to her instead of trying to wring an orgasm from her exhausted body just to feel “better” as soon as possible.

Inuyasha peeled her out of her pajamas, her underwear, and simply smoothed his fingers over her slightly damp skin. She whimpered and sighed at his touch, part of her still demanding that they get this done quickly so she could finally release the tension. Tension she held in every muscle in her body from the constant strain during her twelve hour shift. “Kagome… Just relax, Sweets. Lemme take care of you, ok?” His girlfriend whined out his name, but made no more moves to rush him as she had previously. Inuyasha grinned as she finally let go enough to let  _ him _ be in control.

He brought her up slowly and eased her into it, a sigh of his name instead of the usual scream. Inuyasha was fine with that. She was finally relaxed, comfortable, and sated.

Breathing softly together, they grinned as Inuyasha nuzzled against Kagome’s ear. He took a breath of her scent, more distinctly  _ her _ again. This was what he knew, what he loved. This woman right here. He never wanted to be without her. “Kagome, I… would you let me mark you? Bond us together?” She immediately stiffened, all that tension from before rearing back up.

“What?” she breathed, shock entering her scent.

Inuyasha hesitated at her reaction, but plowed on. “If we’re bonded then you would be…”

“Stop, Inuyasha.” He swallowed abruptly. “Are you asking me because of the… No.”

He balked. “N-No? Kagome, I thought we were in this for the long haul.”

“We are!” she insisted.

“Then why…”

Her eyes filled with tears, stalling his question. “Don’t ask me now. Not because of this.”

“But this is how I can protect you!”

She took a shuddering breath, a sob escaping her. “I know that you want to protect me. I know you’re… we’re  _ both _ scared.” Kagome wiped at her face, frustrated at her tears. “The whole world feels like it’s upside down.” She sobbed again, hand pressing to her mouth to try to muffle it. “Don’t make a decision like this because you’re afraid to lose me.”

There was just the tiniest part of his brain that acknowledged what she was saying and felt the truth in it. Making an impulsive,  _ permanent _ , decision like bonding them together for the rest of their lives in a crisis situation was drastic. Unfortunately, he was reacting mostly on emotion and instinct right then.

“Fine. Fine.” He sat up, kneeling at the end of the bed as he tried not to punch something. Kagome whimpered out his name, hand shaking as she reached toward him. Instinct warred with hurt pride while he huffed for breath, barely restraining a growl. He wanted to run. But he  _ couldn’t _ . They were confined here, together, in this small apartment with no option to go elsewhere. “I need air,” he barked out, yanking on his pants and a t-shirt before leaving the room and barely restraining himself from slamming the door.

Even on the balcony, he could hear Kagome crying, the great gasping sobs. His youkai was howling at him to comfort her while his pride demanded he stay angry. She rejected him. After a year and a half of dating, living together for six months, being nearly inseparable prior to the mandated Stay at Home order… Kagome turned down a proposal. He had heard her reasoning, but that didn’t make the hurt any less destructive. Her life was in jeopardy every day and he had a way to keep her safer… but she didn’t want him to protect her.

Maybe she didn’t trust him to protect her...

Her refusal dragged up every single feeling of rejection he’d experienced in his past, the failed relationships, the outright laughter because of what he was. He  _ knew _ that wasn’t her motivation, in his heart he knew that, but it tumbled through his head anyway. What if she didn’t want him like that? In the past, he’d met human women who treated him like an exotic vacation. He was  _ different _ and different was fun! For a while. But that’s not who you introduced to your parents.

Of course… he had already met her whole family. Her brother helped them move. He had invited him out for a beer a few times. Her grandfather had been a little more guarded, until he helped reorganize a storage shed on the shrine property where Kagome grew up. Then the old man started to grudgingly respect him, asking about the history of his family. Her mother had made not very sly comments about them having puppy-eared children someday. Kagome had flushed and looked horrified. Not because of the idea of having children with him, but that her mother was saying it outright when they had only been together a year. And Kagome knew he could hear every word. A dry smile curled his lip for a moment, shaking his head at how ridiculous it had been.

The sobbing was breaking down his defenses, his need to be upset. No matter how angry, how hurt he was, Kagome was hurting too. And she was already under such intense pressure and stress.  _ Here I am… adding to it.  _ Inuyasha sighed, then growled. Still wounded by her rejection, he wanted to roar out his pain. But the apartment building would not appreciate that at ten at night. He wanted to go roof-hopping, but no matter how impulsive he could be, he wasn’t about to break the law and potentially get a ticket. So he went back inside, shoved his face into the couch to snarl and growl for a few moments and then took a breath and sat on it instead. He went through a few of his own meditations for calm. They helped enough to temper the feeling down to an ache instead of stabbing.

“I’m… I’m sorry,” he heard her whisper from the doorway to their bedroom. So focused on finding his center, he hadn’t noticed her getting up and the door opening. He kept his eyes closed, unable to look at her quite yet. “Can we talk about it?” He grunted what was meant to sound like an affirmative, but came out sounding much angier than he’d meant. “Inuyasha, that isn’t fair.”

“We can talk. What do you have to say?” he snapped. Maybe he hadn’t found his center as well as he thought he had.

“If you’re going to be like that…”

“Just…” He took a calming breath. “Just say what you were going to say, Kagome.”

She hesitated, which he sort of understood. He was struggling to keep his pain from coming out at her sideways when she was trying to talk this out. “I don’t want you to think I’m rejecting you.”

“You aren’t?” he couldn’t help biting out.

“No! I’m not! You know I love you,” she whispered the last.

Inuyasha sensed no lie in her words and slowly felt himself releasing the tension in his legs and back. “I love you, too,” he sighed.

It took a few moments of them being silent in each other’s presence, letting their words sink into one another, before Kagome felt brave enough to speak again. “I just… Now isn’t...”

“Then when will it be ok to ask? Huh? How much longer is this going to go on, Kagome? Months, years?”

She huffed out an incredulous laugh. “You know I have no idea. The cases here are starting to slow down…”

“That’s not what I meant.”

Kagome froze. “You think… you think I said no because I don’t want you?” He remained silent, still, infinitely tense. “Inuyasha, that is… so far off base.”

“Then why did you say no?” he rumbled.

She had to take a deep breath while trying to get her thoughts in order. He was obviously still upset, which she knew he had the right to be, but he also wasn’t listening to reason. “This virus has put us in a position we couldn’t have predicted. We’re stuck here together without anyone else to spend time with…”

He snarled. “So you want to spend time with other people. Are you wanting to break up?” he snapped at her, his tone jeering, raising her hackles. He was trying to bait her into another argument so he could wind himself up to leave, she could feel it. She knew him well enough to know that when emotions ran too high, he tried to escape instead of facing things. She was honestly a little surprised he hadn’t left the apartment earlier.

Kagome felt her heart race as she tried to come up with the words she needed him to hear, the words he needed to hear from her. “No, Inuyasha. The last thing I want is to break up.”

“Then why…”

“Please let me finish?” His lip curled in a snarl, but he quieted. “If we are going to be together forever…  _ Forever _ , Inuyasha… I want it to be because it’s what we both want for our lives. I want to know that you are asking me to be your mate because you want me by your side for the rest of your life, not because you're afraid that I might  _ not _ be.” She took a shuddering breath and blew it out slowly. Verbalizing her biggest fear was going to take a lot, but it was also necessary. “The mating bond is irreversible. I don’t want you to regret your choice.”

He scoffed, but didn’t respond right away. Kagome watched his face twist in thought. “I wouldn’t regret it,” he whispered stubbornly, but she could tell he was beginning to see her point. Giving in to the impulse to mark her now when things were still uncertain would steal the joy from the occasion. It would feel like an act of responsibility rather than an act of love. He sighed, eyes still closed. “But you’re right. It’s not… it’s not the right reason.”

“If the world weren’t like this right now, I would feel differently,” she confessed in a whisper. Inuyasha’s eyes popped open at that, his entire body suddenly on alert and attuned to her. Kagome flushed and looked down at where she was tugging on the hem of her shirt. “I said we were in for the long haul, didn’t I?” Inuyasha slowly uncurled himself from his seat on the couch and padded over to her. She shied away a bit, her embarrassment and continued upset from earlier weighing heavily on her scent. He waited for her to reach out her hand to him so he could gently pull her into his chest. “I'm sorry. I didn’t mean to sound so harsh before.”

Inuyasha let out a deep sigh. “I know. You’re stressed. I… I made it worse. I’m sorry.”

They stood like that for a long time, settling into a soft swaying motion as they breathed. He kept her curled in his arms, forehead against his sternum and his nose pressed to the crown of her head. The scent of her cleansing shampoo hinted at apples, but he could mostly smell her and it began to calm his youkai and the sting of the rejection. He was reminded again why he loved this woman. She was brave enough to stand up to him when it was important. She was brave enough to go out and keep doing a job that put her at risk because her patients needed her. And she kept doing her decontamination protocols every single day because she loved him. He loved how deeply she cared for others.

“Ask me again in a few months?” Her voice was so soft, muffled where her face was pressed into his chest, he almost didn’t comprehend her words.

His heart thumping in his chest, he grinned into her hair. “You bet I will.”


End file.
